Is your child allergic to milk?

Your child seems to hate cow’s milk. He complains of stomach ache every time he has milk. Or maybe it’s your little infant, unable to speak our her problems. Her skin breaks out in rashes whenever it comes in contact with milk or cream. She hates bottle like hell. Maybe it’s a milk allergy, But milk is still important part of a child’s diet, you think. Isn’t it?

We have come to look at milk as the miracle food, atleast for the kids. So it is very difficult for the parents of young kids when they discover that their child suffers from milk allergy. In fact, many cases of milk allergy go undiagnosed. Milk is a very common allergen (allergy causing food) and it is important for new parents to have sufficient knowledge about milk allergy. This is even more important when we realize that classic skin tests are not very effective in conforming milk allergy, and diagnosis is mostly dependent on parent’s observations.

What exactly is Milk Allergy?

Milk allergy can manifest itself in two ways – rapid onset, and delayed onset. In rapid onset allergy, the symptoms (about which we discuss in length later) appear within a couple of hours of consuming a dairy product. This kind is easily detectable. Symptoms in delayed onset reaction may take much longer to occur. This makes it much difficult to diagnose, and often results in a chronic disease.

Unfortunately, Delayed onset reaction is the more common type of milk allergy.

Milk allergy is also often confused with lactose intolerance. While lactose intolerance too results from milk consumption, Milk allergy can also be caused by milk proteins. It is important to understand the difference between the two. Lactose is a type of milk sugar, and lactose intolerance is found in children whose bodies are unable to metabolize it. It happens because the body is not producing enough lactase, the enzyme that breaks down lactose. The production of lactase is genetically programmed, and its deficiency can occur after a few years of life. Once occurred, It is a life long disease.

Milk protein allergy, however, is caused by immune system’s reaction to the milk proteins. The immune system mistakes milk proteins to be harmful foreign elements, and initializes a series of reactions to expel them out of the body. However, most children outgrow this allergy by the age of five, as their immune system slowly learns to recognize the milk proteins.

Symptoms of Milk Allergy Both, lactose intolerance and milk protein allergy result in similar kind of symptoms. The allergy can manifest in the skin, digestive system or the respiratory system. Skin reactions may include an itchy red rash, hives, eczema, swelling of lips, mouth, tongue, face or throat. Digestive system reactions might include nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, gas, bloating, or abdominal cramps. Respiratory system reactions include runny nose, sneezing, watery eyes, itchy eyes, nasal congestion, wheezing, shortness of breath, or coughing. What is important to realize is that none of these symptoms are confirmatory tests of milk allergy. Even the skin tests can not perfectly confirm a milk allergy. The only sure shot way is to closely observe the child and his diet, and monitor the reactions.

Treatment of Milk Allergy There is no treatment for milk allergy. Medication is ineffective in treating this condition. As with most allergies, the best way is to avoid the allergen, in this case milk and other dairy products. It is easier said than done. While closely observing the menu is the only option for older children, infants are best when switched to breast milk or soy based formula. Anyways, Breastfed children are less likely to develop food allergies of any sort. In some cases, though, breastfed children develop reactions when they are exposed to milk proteins that is passed to them from mother’s diet through breast milk. In such cases, a nursing mother needs to strictly follow a non-dairy diet herself. A child with Milk protein allergy needs to be challenged with little amounts of milk after every couple of months to ascertain that she has outgrown her allergy or not. However, as discussed earlier, a lactose intolerant child would always remain so, and ought not to be bothered with such periodic tests.

What ! No milk !This is typically how most acquaintances would react. This stems from a huge emphasis that we place on milk and its nutritional value. However, as the celebrated Dr. Spocks explains in his book, Baby and Child Care, this emphasis is quite misplaced. Animals do not have any milk past infancy, and human body also needs none beyond mother’s milk. But milk is an important source of calcium. Since milk is excluded from the diet of an allergic child, it is important that her diet be nutritionally balanced to overcome the deficiency of calcium. The recommended daily allowance of calcium depends on the age of the individual. Luckily, to meet it is not so hard, as abundant calcium is found in number of plant and animal sources, namely green vegetables (broccoli, collard greens, turnip greens, and kale), fish with soft, edible bones (salmon and sardines), and seafood (oysters and shrimp). The parents should also keep in mind that Calcium cannot be absorbed without Vitamin D. Sources of Vitamin D include eggs, liver, and sunlight.

Summarily, Milk is not the be all of nutrition. Indeed, it can be a primary source of your child’s irritation. Very soon, families of allergic kids find out a number of pleasant ways to avoid milk products, and live happily ever after!!

Choose the Right book for your child

Most of us know about the importance of reading to our children. We already know that it is important to read to the kids in order to foster their vocabulary and intelligence. We know that children who are regularly read to are more likely to turn out to be well read and successful adults. We know bedtime stories should form an important part of a child’s night time ritual.But surely, not all stories are appropriate for all ages. In this article we explore which kind of stories and story books go well for which age . Please note that these are only an indicative suggestion. Parents can determine what stage their child fits in, and choose stories for her accordingly.
1. Age 0-1 year
While some experts argue , and so does our mythology, that unborn children in womb also listen, understand and gain from stories, I doubt so. The American Academy for Pediatrics recommends reading to children from 6 month of age. However, kids this young, or younger if you prefer to start early, can not understand the concept of reading. So you can choose from Dr. Suess or Cosmopolitan or your Newspaper, it makes no difference. The child still gets your time and proximity, and is still exposed to the language, which is all a child gathers from stories at this age. The up side with using newspaper as a source is that your knowledge of current affairs might increase dramatically.
2. Age 1-2 years
Children this age have started comprehending that the pictures (and not words) in the books actually correspond to things in real life. So an 15 month old baby realizes that a picture of the flower in a book actually symbolizes a real flower. This is a great leap in understanding. Choose books that have single simple pictures that the child can relate to. Books that have one picture a page are ideal . Examples of a bad choice of book would be a book with cartoons instead of real photographs, or a book with complicated photographs. You can use a book to discuss about the object. For example, a book that says C for CAT and has a cat’s picture can be used to explain the meeow sound of cat, or that cat’s baby is called a kitten, etc. Towards a later stage the child would also like a simple, easy story attached with the pictures she is watching. 3. Age 2-3 years
This is the age when kids understand that the world is vast, and full of exciting things, animals, machines and what not!! Use their natural curiosity to teach them about animals , values, cars, utensils, anything!!! If you tell your baby the story of how Tajmahal was made, she’ll remember the details, and would save you the trouble of increasing her General Knowledge by immensely mundane and boring ways later. The point is, at this age and later, stories can be used very effectively to teach child a lot of things. The topics can vary from Traffic rules to general etiquettes, seven wonders to mythology, from dinosaurs to river Nile. 4. Age 3-4 years: Children start recognizing alphabets at this stage. They realize that letters make words, and words make stories!!! When you read a story to your child, move your finger along the sentence you are reading. This is a deceptively simple thing, but it drives home the point that stories come from sentences made by words. Your child might also learn to recognize some frequently repeated words just by this simple procedure. You can also choose to change the story a little bit and let your child be the hero. Just change the name of key characters of the story and watch the face of your baby light up like a 100 watt bulb! 5. Age 4-5 years
This is the age when kids believe they have truly become big. And why not, they can do so much themselves and reading is just a step away! We as parents can make learning to read fun from them. Choose easy to read books about a variety of subjects that your child shows interest in. Dr. Suess’s books are world-renowned for their easy readability. Let the child take his own time reading. Be patient. He might be able to read a word in one page, only to get stuck with the same word in the next page. Reading is a very slow process for kids, and our hurrying up is only going to make it tougher for them. Celebrate small accomplishments, and help when asked. 6. Age 5+ years
Now is the time for you to handover the selection to your child. You might not always agree with her decision, but do not force the issue. If she chooses Nancy Drew by looking at the attractive cover, gently explain her that it’s not a 6 or 7 year olds’ book. If she insists, let her choose. She’ll soon come to trust your suggestions.
Stories are children’s window to the world. They are also a very important tool for the parents. Parents can use bedtime stories to explore hard to lecture areas, like sharing. You can also spread values in a non-threatening way. Avoid stories with scary stuff like monsters that can produce nightmares. Remember, one sure shot way of making a story smash-hit with the kids is to customize it. Little Medha will sure be interested in ‘Medha and the three bears’, and what will charm Pratik more than ‘Pratik and the beanstalk’!

Make Travel Fun, for your little One.

I did six cross continental travels with my first baby before he turned 6 months old. Each single one was an exciting experience, and the preparations for each one was a nightmare. I was always nervous about how would my son react to 16 nonstop hours on a chair, and it always turned out better than expected. Now, with my two hand-baggage (read kids), and a husband with a zest for long drives, we are on road/rail/plane a lot, and I have mastered the art of traveling with kids. The secret is in details, indeed. But taking care of the details need not be a difficult task.I have a soft copy of “things to take” that is updated with every travel. As kids grow, nappies are replaced with story books, and so on. But having ready access to this list makes packing so much more easy and fun, and I have forgotten fretting about ‘have I forgotten something ?’ The list is quite an interesting combo, developed from voyages both short and long. After a camping trip (when my daughter was all of 3 months) , I added mosquito repellent as a must-take in it. My once in three months 36 hour train journey from Bangalore to delhi results in points like polybag dustbins and balloons!! So, in some ways this “things to take” list actually reflects the experiences we’ve had on our trips. You might want to start creating one now!As far as infants are concerned, if you give your little one a lot of attention, she’ll bask in the glory of being the central one in your life, and the journey shall pass quickly. The basic needs of a baby are pretty simple – full stomach, dry diaper and available parents. Catering to the needs of a slightly older child is bit more difficult. He might need his life size leopard in the train, or want to get off the plane right now , barely five minutes after take off. It takes more ingenuity to keep him occupied. Apart from stocking up on his toys and books, also consider playing travel games and giving treats that are strictly rationed at home. For example ,our son is not allowed to play any games on the cell phone at home. Cell phone games are strictly for the car. He is generally so immersed in playing ‘snake’, he hates it when the traffic jam clears up and we reach home!!Travel games have to be simple , and ideally should not need much stuff. Counting games are good for little kids just learning numbers. Count how many green cars pass you by, for example. Pretend play is great for travel too!! You and your son can become policemen trying to shoot down every thief (tree with yellow flowers) in sight. There are other aplenty games to play. You can give him hypothetical situations and ask him how would he feel and react in them. How he feels when grandpa comes home. What would he do if he is lost. What would he do if he is thirsty in a desert. You can also give him puzzles. Start with easy ones to build up his confidence and interest (Which animal is the largest on land and has a huge trunk? ) , And then move on to slightly tougher ones (Which black and white animal is endangered and lives in china.) Another hot favorite in travel games is memory games, where you ask your child to remember some things and then try to recall it after some time. Finally, it’s all about having fun with your child. If you are all worked up, the child can sense the tension, and will react by being tense about the journey herself. You would probably find out, as I did, that although prior preparations are a must, the best part of a trip is often things and games that come up unexpectedly, as so many good things in life do.

Must Knows for Your Child

As Parents, we teach a lot of things to our little ones. We teach them numbers and alphabets – capital and small. We teach them colors and shapes and nursery rhymes. We teach them the names of capitals, currencies and rivers of the world. We teach them about the presidents and prime-ministers and about Bill Gates. And then, we wonder, have we taught them enough ?
The answer our conscience gives us generally is “No”. The world is competitive, and it is full of child prodigies. And we are only trying to ensure our offspring’s secure, successful future. Isn’t it? What we loose sight of, however, is the present.
A child learns. He is programmed to learn. He learns the numbers and letters and everything else by sheer curiosity. As long as you read him enough books on varied subjects, he’ll learn. But there are indeed a few essentials that every child must know, and that every parent must take pains to teach their child. You might want to add to this list of mine according to your own beliefs. I believe, that a child must know :
That He is good, and the world is good too. And that he is safe here, because his parents love him and ensure his safety. He must know his address and telephone numbers, and he must know how to reach his parents in case he needs them. He must know that he can trust the security person in the mall, and the neighborhood families etc. He must live with a sense of security. The ugly truth of life should be safely hidden from him for now.
That all are equal. Girls are as good as boys. If boys are stronger, girls are smarter. That poor people deserve the same respect and dignity as others do. And that animals and plants have equal right to life as humans. I use this to propagate vegetarianism in my kids. But respect for life can be preached equally well in non-vegetarian families too.
That etiquettes and courtesy are important part of ones’ social life, and being a kid is no excuse.
That world is a wonderful place with flowers, butterflies, fairies and Santa Claus. And the children are in this world to make it extra-wonderful. They are blessed with unique talents, gifts and potential , and they’ll be given the environment to harness it.
That no matter what, Mom and Dad will always love him, and will always have time to listen to him. He is the priority no.1 of his parents, and everything else comes a distant second. He can count on them.
That Books are the greatest invention ever. They have the most wonderful stories and facts, and that his parents love reading to him. Once he grows up, he’ll love reading too!
That some things are dangerous and kids should not touch them- Wires, Iron, electric tools, Sockets. And there are other stuff that one needs to be careful with – Heights, hot food, knives and scissors etc.
Every child, specially girls, must know about public and private parts of their body. They must be taught that it is not okay if someone touches the private parts, and they must immediately inform parents in case such a thing happens. The statistics of child abuse are alarming, and the victim’s age is generally much lower than we can ever think of!
Remember, being the smartest kid in preschool is no guarantee of his future success. However, the gifts of a safe, secure and carefree childhood may go a long way in instilling self-confidence in your child, which is so important for successes of all kinds. Ofcourse there is academic stuff that a kid should know, and the net is full of sites for such an information. But then, there are some things that can not be taught in a classroom, and they are often, the must-knows.

Parents are people too!!

We have witnessed a kind of revolution lately. A silent, but highly successful revolution, in which little people have taken over the world from grownups. Suddenly, A whole generation of young parents is living under the commands , wishes and whims of three foot tall kings and queens. These Kings and Queens are not only responsible for deciding what to buy and where to go, but also a huge portion of how their parents lead their lives.It is like a epidemic. Almost all ambitious career women I knew have hung up their boots to rear their young ones. They probably expected an easy life ahead, full of sweet stories and TV soaps when they had put in their papers. Instead, they are on their tiptoes, day long, 24/7 , juggling pizza and pasta, karate class and swimming lessons, indoor and outdoor games. They are required to be the world’s best cook, coach, storyteller and driver. And when Papa comes home, the duty changes. A new servant arrives to pamper and serve the little rulers. The parents, willingly, relinquish the command of the household to the apple of their eyes. They give up on their grown-up pleasures, and hobbies, and lead life with a singular aim of creating an IIT/IIM/AIIMS graduate of their child. So, you’ll find plenty of parents using all available techniques, teaching nursery rhymes to 18 month olds and reading to three year olds! The situation in a lot of homes is frankly, out of control!!!I am not suggesting that we stop caring for our kids. Neither is it wrong to be ambitious about them. In fact , it is quite natural for parents to dream big for their children. Parents in all ages and eras have been doing so. But I would definitely say that weaving ones life totally around the kids , and to loose the independence in the process we so craved for as a teenager, is going a bit too far. Parents need to stop being a doormat, and look at their needs as genuinely important too. Not only will it teach kids to respect their parent’s time and efforts, it will also prevent parental ‘burn-out’ resulting from giving to much of oneself to the process of parenting. There is another reason for me to advocate this. I see, all around me, young, talented moms, dedicating their whole time to their kids. The only point of conversation with them is their kids. They can go on and on about little Richa’s paintings and Mehul’s theatrics, but try to hold their attention for more than one minute on any other general topic!! Either Richa would be eating sand, or Mehul’s nose would start running. Mamma darling has to run with the Hankey, so bye friend. Nice talking to you. These mothers entirely lose out on adult company, for they are too busy being a hankey, pillow, spoon etc. to be an interesting adult!! They lose touch with their old friends, and never get around to make new ones. Unfortunately for them, kids don’t need mammas for ever. Sooner or later , they grow up old enough to fetch their own real hankey, pillow and spoon. Mamma is no longer needed in the playground, and is only tolerated in PTA meetings. When such a time arrives, the doting , all-sacrificing mother has neither a hobby nor a friend to fall back upon. It is great to have a baby. It is even more wonderful to watch her grow, and to be a party in her growth. No achievement can compare to the feeling a parent gets to see the child play a tune perfectly on the keyboard !! But we should be alert that this does not start defining our lives totally. If your kid goes to a class, join a class nearby yourself. You’ll learn something new, and your child would have a role model in you. Don’t get so engrossed in watching your kids grow, that you stop growing yourself. (Except the occasional gray hair, of course). Let them have some time by themselves while you watch your favorite serial. It doesn’t have to be cartoon all the time. Do not postpone your facial till eternity. Or calling friends over for a chat. Your child will get around to understand that Mom has life beyond him too. I agree, that these are precious years for your preschooler. But these are not exactly junk years for you either. As you help and support and nourish your young one, cherish and grow yourself too. Do not feel guilty in taking some personal time away from the kids. It will do you good, and will eventually help the whole family. Also worth considering is the fact, that children learn best when they are not being taught. They assimilate, understand and remember information best when it arrives to them from natural sources, and when they ask for it. They learn best when unhurried. So why bother yourself making your kid mug the full Encyclopedia Britannica, when you can use that time to get a full body massage once a week for the whole lifetime!! (And your child would still learn a lot from the Encyclopedia, at his on pace, at his own time) .

Outdoors is a great teacher.

When my son’s summer holidays started, I assumed it was the start of my 32/7 workday. I geared myself up for the constant clatter of “Mom, I’m bored” , “Mom , look at my bubble” or “Mom, Please give me a candy”. Top it with “Mom, Why can’t I see TV now, please please puh-lease!” In a nutshell I geared myself up for a constant Mom-call, resulting from the always-inside-boredom. And then suddenly I realized, “I don’t have to keep him inside always!” I also realized that outdoors teaches him more than all my educational CDs put together can!
The problem with most families is that there are no safe outdoors anymore where a child could be left alone. An outdoor time for the kid, invariably translates into outdoor time for one of the parent too. And time, as we learn after growing up, is indeed precious. Not, however, more precious than our little ones. A five year old can reasonably venture out himself for some time in a traffic-less, crime-free area if he has had been given requisite training. If that is not possible, however, you can use the imposed outdoor time for yourself : walk in the park while he plays in the playground, read a magazine while he climbs the tree over your bench, paint your nails while he catches the butterflies. The point is, you can find the time if you believe it is important enough for your child.
Is it important enough? Can catching butterflies be at par with learning numbers? Can climbing trees be as helpful as learning phonics? My answer is NO. It is not equal, but in fact much more important than the academics. What better way to instill the qualities of observation and concentration than watching insects and butterflies? Outdoors provide unlimited opportunities for the alert mind to capture. An alert parent can use these opportunities aplenty. Even if the child is playing alone, the time that seems to us as ‘wasted’ is actually being used by her active little mind in thousands of ways. While indoor teaching is quite uni-dimensional, life outside requires each and every sense to be used. Even with the advent of multimedia in schools and homes, it essentially remains an exercise of eyes, ears and an often dormant mind. A park, in contrast, exercises the sense of touch and smell, sight and sound, mind and soul.
Another favorite outdoor activity for kids his age remains sand play. Do invest in a good set of beach toys. The essentials include a big bucket to hold sand, different size and shapes of moulds, sieve to sift the sand, a spatula and a fork. While any outdoor activity presents innumerable opportunities to teach, let me pick sand play as an example of how an alert and involved parent can use sand play to help his child physically, cognitively and socially.
Lets a child manipulate sand in multiple ways – to collect, sift , wet, pack, throw, drop and mold.
Guides a child to make mountains, tunnels, flyovers etc. Encourages creativity.
Explains the properties of sand. The difference between dry and wet sand, their feel and their weight.
Allows other kids to share their toys, ensures peaceful group play.
Explains the child what he is doing using a variety of words, increasing the child's vocabulary and expressiveness.
On days that are excessive rainy or cold, or when you are a bit too busy, an indoor sand box comes handy. Make sure the sand used is hygienic, dry and well-covered when not in use.
Once in a while, you might want to take your child to a special trip. Take her fishing, camping, mountain climbing or river-rafting. Besides education, You will give her an experience that will have much more impact than a hundred trips to mall. I am not even mentioning the effect it would have on the bond that you share with her. I myself have a very poor memory , and hardly remember my early days. However, among the very few images that I do remember, is when my father used to take me and my brother swimming in the river Narmada on his Bajaj scooter. Though I was only 5 years old then, I remember the whole experience as if it happened yesterday. I remember the sight of papa swimming against the river and feeling secure in his arms, I remember the odd treats he got us from the vendors sitting on the ghaats, and I remember the half an hour ride on the scooter. It is my only vivid and clear memory from my early years, and I can’t thank my dad enough for taking the pains to give it to me.
Could a little discomfort and some extra effort stop me from giving my children equally exciting memories?

A for Apples, T for Tantrums.

Each and Every Parent goes through a period of tantrum handling. (In fact , my 20 month old daughter is lying on ground right besides my chair right now, throwing a tantrum, demanding that I hand the computer over to her immediately). Each and every child throws a tantrum once in a while. It’s a natural way of communicating extreme feelings for kids, who have not developed adequate speech skills yet! However natural it might be, it still manages to throw parents out of gear, and the feelings range from desperation to shamefulness and anger. It’s takes a big heart and some knowledge of tantrums to handle the situation correctly.

As any parent would vouch for, children throw tantrum when you most want them to be well behaved. In a shop grocery shopping, in a fine dining restaurant or when you have an important phone call to attend to. They instinctively seem to realize that mom/dad is not completely available to me at this point of time, and immediately demands that attention!! While shopping, kids often act up asking for one, or one hundred different candies or toys or so on. In fact, if observed carefully, we find that tantrums come mostly when the child is tired, exhausted , hungry , sleepy, bored, or even over-stimulated. It is just that these little adults are trying to exercise their power of choice, which they don’t have. It is a frustrating , confusing world for them, a world where mom and dad impose their will on him all the time. He wants to be an unique individual in his own right, and the process is more difficult for him than it is for you. Be sympathetic. Be sympathetic. Easier said than done, of course. However there are a few dos and don’ts that can help you sail through ‘quietly’ through this turbulent period :
Precaution is better than cure . Try stopping a tantrum before it starts. Keep in mind the limits of your child while planning a day out. Keep in mind that he might be tired after a movie, and going grocery shopping then is like sending an invitation to the tantrums. In a shop, if their demand is reasonable and not outrageous, maybe it can be accepted.
When the tantrums do start, as they invariably will at times, remember that it is not a time to loose your cool. Be calm. Let the child go through it safely. If you, an adult, are not able to control your emotions, can you expect more from your kid ?
Do not worry about onlookers. Those who have kids would understand, Those who don’t, will understand later when they do have one. Remember, kids with a tantrum are not bad, they are just ‘over-worked’. They deserve firm love, not another scolding.
Do not give in to their demand. Your response would determine future frequency of the tantrums. Do not make tantrums a rewarding experience for them. The difference between a boy who keeps asking for gratifications to a mall (I want this, and that , and thaaaaat) and a boy who calmly goes through it, is whether their parents gave in to their tantrums when the boys were 2 years old, or not)
Voice what the child is going through, and what he wants. “Oh!! You’re so upset, because you want that Barbie, aren’t you??” It helps them in two ways: One, they know that the parents understands their demand and feelings, and secondly, they learn to put feelings in words for the next time.
Give moderate amount of choice. So don’t say: “What do you want for dinner?” (for your own sake!) but “ Do you want parantha or rice today?”
Kids eventually grow out of tantrums, as they develop better strategies to get stuff out of their parents. (Yeah! That’s true, it never stops!!) So just take it as another developmental milestone and do not attach extra importance to it.